a whole new world

A Whole New World

Yesterday i got home and felt an urge to feel my fingers on de piano keys once more... I know nobody will believe i learnt grade 8, cuz i really dun deserve it, and my standard's like that of a n00b... Anywae, i juz looked at de score of "A Whole New World"...and began to play and sing along...

Well, call it torment for anyone who heard that...it doesn't matter, cuz it was satisfyin to juz do a solo performance for myself... It wasn't any spectacular singin i suppose, but de bottomline was i kept in tune... It would be utterly diu lian to be tone deaf when i've learnt de piano for quite some time... Okok, actually de amount of time and effort i put in it doesn't really amount to anythin...

Come to think of it, i've got this problem inside me that i know clearly but i've let it relapse over and over again... Whenever i do somethin, it's not that i don't wanna do it well or i don't try...de thing is i juz don't seem to be able to be more of a master at anythin... Well some people say i've got great ball sense, in badminton, football and wateva with balls..but i feel i'm more spread out than focused... For piano (or wushu or studies as well), i feel i was more saturated as in performin much better than what i'm supposed to be but as de years went by, i slipped behind the standard i'm supposed to be at... It's a flaw, perhaps complacency, but not really cuz i do try...or am i in self-denial... I don't think i'm in a whole new world, i'm still in de same old world of self-satisfaction, meetin my lowly-set standards for wateva crap i do...i suck...